Motherhood: Before and after

 For this two weeks, blogger mommies from Singapore would be sharing about their journey through motherhood, and how it has changed them.  If you have your own motherhood story to share, do link-up at the bottom of the post!  


Today's post is by V, who is mum to 3.5 year old Noey and 1-year old Nomi. She is 8 months into her Stay-At-Home-Mum gig and frequently wonders what she got herself into when she signed up for the job. On her blog, Life is in the Small Things, she blogs about, yes, the small things (make that 2 naughty little small things), but also the big moments that life is about. She also really loves being a mum though it might not always be apparent!

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When Jus asked how my life has been changed by motherhood, a series of pictures flashed before my eyes.

And these are just the tip of the iceberg!

In my post-motherhood state, I now:

• Wear flats everyday and love them. It's amazing how when the folks you interact with the most throughout a day are under 1m tall, you don't really feel the appeal of appearing taller than your 1.58m anymore.
• Have the ability to eat really fast. This coming from someone whose boyfriend-now-husband felt physical pain from eating so slowly while trying keep pace with her so that he would not finish too quickly, it is quite an accomplishment.
• Can also bathe, change, walk and shop really fast. The shopping is particularly significant, since I am chronically afflicted with indecision. Now I grab and go and try not to think too much about it.
• Am much more of a stickler for punctuality. This is what having to keep multiple schedules and having very limited and precious free time does to you.
• Appreciate sleep. I'll admit that I still think sleeping is a waste of time, but I now now that a short afternoon nap does wonders for the mind and spirit.

Seriously, motherhood has changed me in ways apart from the frivolous. It has shown up my flaws - my tendency to cut corners when I'm tired, how mad I can get when I am pushed to the limit, and how hopeless I am at art and craft. Yet, it has also enabled me to find within myself incredible amounts of strength which I never knew I had. I feel like I'm taking a lifelong course on self-control and sacrifice. I can only pray that I will meet the passing grade in the end!

Becoming a mum has taught me so many things, but the ones which I appreciate the most are that:

1. You never stop being a mother, or a parent, and you never stop loving. I don't think I ever realized how much my parents loved me - and still do - until I became a parent myself. I think as a child, it is easy to take that love and concern which your parents shower on you for granted, especially if it's what you've known all your life. Only after I started reliving the steps that they must have walked with my own children did it occur to me that my parents must have loved me the same way I now love my children. And even as grandparents, they still care for me, as their daughter, and then my children by extension. I have not always had the best relationship with my mother, but I try harder now, because I now have a better understanding of where she's coming from.

2. Every child - and indeed every person - is different. I have two children, both from the same "factory" but so different in personality. Even when they are so young, I know that the methods for teaching and discipline will be different for each of them. This has taught me to be more flexible, to understand that there is more than one right answer to every problem. And sometimes, you just have to do what works! (Within reason, of course.)

3. There is so little you can control in life. I don't think I've ever prayed as hard as I do now, when I hold in my hands two precious little lives. It is humbling to know that while you can do your best to train, guide and nurture your child in ways which you believe are right, you can't control how they turn out. You can only intercede for them, resting on the assurance that God is in control.

It might not look like it, and I certainly don't feel it everyday, but being a mummy is truly the best thing ever. I just have to remember that!

How has motherhood changed you?  Link-up below if you have a story to share: